he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
