I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
