she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
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