I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize