And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize