she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
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She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
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Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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