we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
She even gives head with a lisp.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
