love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
my poor anus
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
