He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize