idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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