the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Randomize
