while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
