they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Randomize
