I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
