hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
