he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
a search helicopter?!
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
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