woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize