Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
