dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I have demons in me.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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