Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
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