And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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