Where did you get a picture of my penis
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
