I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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