would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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