we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize