okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
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