Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize