worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
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