yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize