She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
