Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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