ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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