Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize