How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.