I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i scared a bird with my dick
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize