And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
