I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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