So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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