Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
