I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
