Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize