batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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