Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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