My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
