if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize