Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
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