Do you still have your period?
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
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And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
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Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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