i love accidental penises.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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