HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
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