Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
