Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
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